December 25, 2011: Drops of Water on Stone; Fruitcake Vindicated

Yeah, I know there’s a lot of you that profess to have fruitcake-hate. It’s almost a Christmas cliché to hate fruitcake. I have a couple of theories about this, but it is almost impossible to resolve most of these because when I start to talk to people about fruitcake, I usually get shut right down with a “Nope…fruitcake is not for me. Don’t like it. Never have. Never will.”

And before I go on…yes, I know there are more important things to address this Christmas. I’ll do “World Peace” or some other worthy issue some other Christmas, but today…please indulge me.

I have never lied to you, dear readers, and never will. I am officially coming out as a fruitcake lover!!! OK, my own peculiar infatuation aside, would someone please tell me: what the hell is there not to like about fruitcake!!!? C’mon folks, really? You’ve got dried fruit. What’s wrong with that? You’ve got nuts. Everyone likes nuts. And you’ve got cake. Who hates cake? Plus, you can soak fruitcake in brandy or a nice bourbon and it just improves the whole mélange of tastes.

Admittedly, fruitcake is, for me, a comfort food. Every year, some business associate would send a fruitcake to my father, just before Christmas. When it arrived, each year, I would start salivating like one of Pavlov’s dogs. We had a family injunction against opening the fruitcake, but scamp that I was, I often opened it up anyway and blamed it on one of my siblings. I just couldn’t get my fix fast enough. Also, that fruitcake was the harbinger of the whole Christmas season, so I associated fruitcake with that ramping up of excitement for the main event of  the year in our house: Christmas.

OK, but that’s me. What about the rest of you? Well, one of my theories is that there must be some really awful fruitcakes out there somewhere. One thing that certainly doesn’t help is the addition of citron in most fruitcakes. I’m not sure who had the bright idea of adding dried citron to fruitcakes, but I personally blame this person for the downfall for what could be the perfect treat, fruitcake could be. Citron is the fruit of an Asian citrus tree. The fruit is similar to a lemon, but all I can tell you is that dried citron is bitter! Fruitcake makers have gotten wise to this and have reduced the amount of citron they put in. As a child, I used to pick out the citron in each piece for a more perfect fruitcake.

The other theory I have is that people are caving into popular opinion and just say they hate fruitcake…and I have the evidence to support this:  For the last five years I have gone to bat for my beloved fruitcake. Each year, I have walked up to the bakery section of my local grocery store and firmly, but politely asked why they don’t stock fruitcake. The standard reply was “No one likes it” to which I would reply “Well, I do, and I don’t believe I’m alone on this, so please order some next year.” It took five years, but I can be very stubborn and I was on a quest. Like drops of water wearing down stone, my resolve finally got results. Lo and behold, this year, I was pleased and surprised to see it stocked! In a return visit to purchase more, I ended talking to the person that ordered fruitcake to thank her. I noticed there was only four left on Christmas Eve and I asked her how many she had ordered. “Forty-eight” was the answer. I bought two. So, in my close perimeter, that makes forty-two other fruitcake lovers!!!

I have one young friend who has told me that she would never ever taste fruitcake again and that she loves all kinds of food! It made me sad that there are people of the next generation who may not have a fruitcake appreciation. I asked her when she first tried it and it turned out that she had it when she was very young, so maybe fruitcake may not be a good treat for the very young.

If you have ever had a bad fruitcake experience, do me  a favor: try to give it another shot. You just might be surprised. And, if you are one of those who say you don’t like fruitcake, just sneak it on the sly. I won’t tell. Promise. It’ll be our little secret.

December 22, 2011: Christmas Bark

This is a treat I used to make my students at Christmas. I used to put pieces of Christmas Bark in small plastic bags with a Christmas quote of some sort attached to the tie sealing the bag. Then I put the whole bag into a Christmas coffee mug. I used to enjoy this making Christmas Bark and I do miss the tradition. It’s pretty easy to make and has generated a lot of fans over the years.

Christmas Bark:  Toast @ 325°F 1C. whole Pecans and 2C. whole Walnuts on a cookie sheet covered in parchment for about 20 minutes, turning often. Cool and coarsely chop. Also chop 1C. Craisings (or you could substitute Dried Cherries.) On a double-boiler, over medium heat, melt 7C. semi-sweet chocolate chips. When chocolate is melted, add nuts and craisins and stir until both are coated with chocolate. On a 10″ X 15″cookie sheet, covered with parchment, pour the chocolate mixture and use spoon to level. Cool at room temperature and then further cool in fridge. Chocolate will harden in about 30 minutes. Break, by hands (covered with rubber gloves to keep both you and the chocolate clean, but also to insulate the chocolate from your hands’ warmth) into chunks and bag. Use the tines of a fork to break the tougher pieces. Keep all pieces that you are not working on breaking, in the fridge, as your hands will start to melt the chocolate if it is at room temperature.

Simple. Tasty. Quickly made. An original Christmas treat!

September 08, 2011: A Summer Harvest

Green Tomato Relish

This last weekend, I had the chance of doubling up on social occasions as Teja and Barb were christening the patio we built together with a party, the same day as my former student, Isaac, was moving not too far away from Teja’s. I started at Isaac’s and got to meet his friend Kelly, and her friend Andrea, who was helping them to move also. Isaac and Kelly had a nice garden in the back and they cleverly transplanted all they could, into buckets they could take with them.

For years, I had a really good vegetable garden, but the squirrels that live in my oaks ate everything they liked and dug up all the rest. I was loath to kill the squirrels and so, switched to flowers, which they leave alone. These days, I have no money for even the flowers, so the garden had gone to seed and weeds. I do miss the fresh-grown veggies very much.

As if a good days work and the congenial company weren’t enough compensation, Isaac had harvested what they couldn’t take from the garden, and gave me a full bag of delicious fresh foodstuffs. He included herbs, squashes, beets, heritage carrots, peppers, and green tomatoes that I turned into relish. Isaac and Kelly’s tomatoes yielded about 4 cups.

Green Tomato Relish:

• 4C. Green Tomatoes (diced)           •  4C. Green Cabbage (thinly sliced)
• 1 Onion+3 Cloves Garlic (diced)    •  2C. Mixed Peppers (diced)
• 2 C. Veggie Broth                              •   2C. Cider Vinegar
• 1 Tblsp. each of Brown Sugar and Crushed Hot Peppers
• 1/2 Teasp. of seeds of each: Fennel, Dill, Celery, Dill, Cumin,
• 1/2 Teasp. of Sal de Mer & Peppercorns + 2″ Cinnamon Stick (all spices tied up in cheesecloth and tied w/twine)

Over medium heat in large pan, fry onion and garlic in about 4 Tblsp. vegetable oil until soft, with crushed hot peppers. Add tomatoes and cabbage. Continue cooking. Add diced peppers shortly after and cook. Add stock and vinegar, and bag of spices. Bring to boil, then reduce heat and simmer 20 minutes. Cool relish with spice bag, then remove. Seal relish in sterile container and chill.

After moving Isaac and Kelly, it was on to Teja and Barb’s for a cookout. Dan, once again brought his fine sous-vide chuck steak done to a tender, pink perfection, which I cubed and made kabobs with, then grilled. See my August 21, 2010: Welcoming Party for the Girls article for more details on this dish. It was a splendid night of superb company in front of the warm fire on the new patio.  My friends have been exceptionally supportive through my recent hard times with my struggle to find work. When I consider how much they have given me: the advice, emotional (and sometimes economic) support, and just knowing they are out there somewhere in the world, has made all the difference. I think of Isaac, of Teja, of Barb, of Dan, of Deena, Carolyn, Lisa last week, Yoshio the week before: kind and generous friends, all.

When I was a gardener, it often occurred to me that there was an analogy between the garden and the affairs of the human heart: you plant with promise and hope that all those tiny seeds will survive to full term. They don’t. Animals take some. Winds, heat, disease…even water, which the plants need so much, take others. Even if all seeds start to grow, there is that awful culling which a gardener has to perform, so that some of the plants survive. (That was the only part I hated about gardening. I always wanted ALL the seeds to grow!) Like relationships, gardening can be a tough, time-consuming, and often a dirty, nasty business. You do it with the devotion it deserves, because both gardens and relationships are worth it and that for the simple fact that this kind of devotion is love personified.

I stand at the edge of my present garden and the physical reality is a fallow mess, with nothing to harvest but weeds. However, when I think of the pleasant company and good will of my friends…I realize that I already have my summer harvest (both physical and emotional) and I could not ask for a more bountiful one. So, I face the reality. I close my eyes, and dream…of a more perfect garden.

January 14, 2011: Grilled Olive Sandwich

When I think back, I feel so sorry for my mom. Poor lady. Not only did she have to cook and try to please the individual tastes of a family of ten, but she had this brat of a son, who was to grow up to be an amateur  chef, who even in childhood had discriminating tastes. Not finicky, so much…I tried just about everything, including the horror of my dad’s favorite: pigs feet. Whoa! No wonder I’m a vegetarian today! Not to say mom couldn’t get some things spot on: I’ve only recently mastered her homemade pizza and vegetable soup, and her deviled eggs were quite good.

Her daily lunches needed work, ‘tho. I remember her foisting her “meatloaf sandwiches” on me. Yeah, a thick slab of cold, congealed, tasteless meat on white bread. Right. They got flung to the back of pantry…purposely…knowing full well that it was my sister Mary Lou’s job was to clean the pantry and that she absolutely hated mold (you’re beginning to see what a brat I really was!)

Two sandwiches  mom did right quite well were grilled cheese and…(bear with me, if you’ve never had one)…cream cheese and olive. These seems to be either regional (east coast) or from that period of time, because I never see them offered anywhere! I decided to blend both of mom’s best and make a grilled cream cheese and olive.

These sandwiches couldn’t be easier: take two slices of bread (I used a rye and pumpernickel blend) and put a layer of spreadable cream cheese on each. Next, on the cream cheese, put a few slices of stuffed manzanilla olives (really a common misspelling of “manzanillo” olives: the small, green spanish olives stuffed with pimento.) I added a sprinkling of white pepper and Herbs de Provence. Then, cook as a grilled cheese sandwich (on medium heat, melt a pat of butter, add sandwich, flip when cooked, serve hot.) Delicious, easy, and quick!

I’m sitting for the girls tomorrow and I am excited to see if they like this sandwich as well as I did when I was their age. It would be good to “pass the baton” with this unique American comfort food!